just . . . jessabelle.

Happy Birthday, Theresa!

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 23:00:32 -0500

I hope that you took time to sleep in, have a fruity drink, get a pedicure, or maybe even check out a really intense Cuban cage fight today! Whatever floats your boat, Lady — it’s your day!

This photo might capture the spirit of the getup Jeff likes to...

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 19:22:48 -0500

This photo might capture the spirit of the getup Jeff likes to wear about town when he’s running errands and doesn’t want to be bothered. Or, it might be a picture of my dad during a particularly trying time in his life that our family rarely talks about.

The only way you’ll find out is by listening to our first official episode of 21st Century Penpals, which is ON. ITS. WAY.

Shake Ya Tailfeather ft. Nelly and P. Diddy, by Murphy Lee. I...

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 12:30:00 -0500

Shake Ya Tailfeather ft. Nelly and P. Diddy, by Murphy Lee.

I HAVE CLEANING TO DO AND IMPORTANT ERRANDS TO RUN.
And I’ll play this really loud in my car to scare all the white people.

(via fireland) You never did want to be a police, didya girl.

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 00:51:00 -0500

(via fireland)

You never did want to be a police, didya girl.

My sentiments EXACTLY.

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 22:07:19 -0500

As usual, butthurt erupts and no one steps forward to speak for the frank and unapologetic elitists.

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 20:19:00 -0500

inthefade:

(via danielsh)

I am so elitist I wear Fancy Pants. Just ask Jessica.

It’s true. Michele’s Fancy Pants are so fancy that she’s not allowed to wear them unless her legs are freshly dusted with a powder derived from Tim Haines’ crushed spirit.

Click through for more Awkward Family Photos.

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 19:40:07 -0500

Click through for more Awkward Family Photos.

Thanks a lot, 60 Minutes.

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 18:23:49 -0500

Since my father is now officially retired, he has a lot of free time on his hands. When he’s not fishing, cutting wood, or tinkering around on a farm project, he’s watching television. I worry where all this TV viewing is leading, and the ideas it is filling his impressionable mind with. In some respects, the man is a veritable blank canvas.

Case in point: Lately, whenever dear old Dad receives a phone call from a stranger whom he suspects is a scam artist, he proudly rebuffs their request for his personal information with a resounding “I’m not falling for your tricks, buddy! You can call my daughter — she’s a lawyer!!!!” He then proceeds to give the hapless cog my office number. My father is very proud of these exchanges. Proud that he swiftly avoided what was surely to be his financial ruin, proud that he has a lawyer-daughter to summon to his every cause. Afterward, Dad calls me all aglow and tells me point-by-point how he laid into a would-be swindler. It’s his glory moment of the day.

The problem is, some of these people are calling him about legitimate business. Last week, an exasperated representative from his bank called me at work because my father had hung up on her two times in a row when she tried to inform him of suspicious activity on an account. Last month, he called my brother’s student loan officer a “greedy fucking dupek.” (dupek is Polish for asshole) I admittedly agree with his assessment of the matter, but still. My father is slowly turning into the Slavic equivalent of Andy Rooney, and I want it to stop. Especially before his eyebrows eat his face. He’s only 64, people. This is all happening too soon. I’m not an adult yet.

(via weselec)YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 00:45:17 -0500

(via weselec)

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

… and on that note — Have a good weekend, everyone!

Sat, 05 Dec 2009 09:38:04 -0500

… and on that note — Have a good weekend, everyone!

I was inspired by everydaydude. But still, I’ve decided...

Wed, 02 Dec 2009 20:09:00 -0500

I was inspired by everydaydude. But still, I’ve decided to go with some crazy elbow-length cashmere gloves I just found online.
Thanks, everybody!

I just won $50 from a scratch ticket that I found on the ground!

Wed, 02 Dec 2009 19:50:35 -0500

What’s something interesting and unique I should do with my winnings??

WINEgasm!

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 19:45:00 -0500

WINEgasm!

(link best viewed directly from my Tumblr.) sigh Ok, so this...

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 11:37:00 -0500

(link best viewed directly from my Tumblr.)

*sigh* Ok, so this is awkward.

There’s this thing @fedge and I have been working on and we’ve been having a lot of fun working it and getting to know each other better in the process and I admit that sometimes I want to kill him so I have this old Care Bear that I throw at the wall when I’m mad at him because he’s in Seattle and I’m in Maine and sometimes I’m sure he wants to kill me but all in all we amuse the fuck out of each other and I hope that’s apparent when you listen to our thing because you are going to listen to it because I’m going to ask you random questions about it later and you don’t want to have to be all like, “yeah, … I remember that part. It was funny!” and I’ll have to be all “Liar! I made that part up just to test you! You’re dead to me now!”

Jeff & Jess: 21st Century Penpals
homepage
Tumblr
Twitter
Flickr
Dropbox: Episode 00

Thoughts, comments? 21CPenpals@gmail.com

glueslabs: 21st Century Penpals presents… Jeff & Jess: 21st...

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 01:32:00 -0500

glueslabs:

21st Century Penpals presents…

Jeff & Jess: 21st Century Penpals

Pilot episode

And so I entered the podcasting business with Jessabelle2o7. If you’re having trouble getting the episode from the link above, try downloading it directly from here.

“I hope you’re not getting any more beer, because...

Fri, 27 Nov 2009 22:11:00 -0500

“I hope you’re not getting any more beer, because I’m gonna get some beer, okay?”

— Dirck. Dirck Storms.

Um, … guys? This is perhaps the most coolest thing ever. ...

Fri, 27 Nov 2009 15:11:00 -0500

Um, … guys? This is perhaps the most coolest thing ever. I got the raglan shirt with black sleeves, and a totebag with green handles. And, they sell big-ass coffee mugs, so you can flaunt your moral superiority about the office in the utmost style. There’s a Black Friday sale going on, and free shipping for purchase totals over $35. Go to http://www.zazzle.com/gorillasushi and DO IT.

P.S. Jason Phillips a.k.a. @GorillaSushi is my power animal on three-day weekends.

JESSABELLE!!!! HAHAHA

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 20:50:00 -0500

worldwarmike:

I’M A POWER LESBIAN!! YOU SHOULD SEE ME ROCK A PANTSUIT!!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go watch The L Word.

DUDE. We should totally scissor under an old quilt.

worldwarmike: I’M THANKFUL FOR MY SEXINESS. I’ve...

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 20:29:08 -0500

worldwarmike:

I’M THANKFUL FOR MY SEXINESS.

I’ve never been more confused about my sexuality. Because you’re the hottest lesbian I’ve ever seen.

Hot Ticket #1 (my mom) and Hot Ticket #2 (my grandfather).

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 16:54:00 -0500

Hot Ticket #1 (my mom) and Hot Ticket #2 (my grandfather).

just . . . jessabelle.

Happy Birthday, Theresa!

This photo might capture the spirit of the getup Jeff likes to...

Shake Ya Tailfeather ft. Nelly and P. Diddy, by Murphy Lee. I...

(via fireland) You never did want to be a police, didya girl.

My sentiments EXACTLY.

As usual, butthurt erupts and no one steps forward to speak for the frank and unapologetic elitists.

Click through for more Awkward Family Photos.

Thanks a lot, 60 Minutes.

(via weselec)YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

… and on that note — Have a good weekend, everyone!

I was inspired by everydaydude. But still, I’ve decided...

I just won $50 from a scratch ticket that I found on the ground!

WINEgasm!

(link best viewed directly from my Tumblr.) *sigh* Ok, so this...

glueslabs: 21st Century Penpals presents… Jeff & Jess: 21st...

“I hope you’re not getting any more beer, because...

Um, … guys? This is perhaps the most coolest thing ever. ...

JESSABELLE!!!! HAHAHA

worldwarmike: I’M THANKFUL FOR MY SEXINESS. I’ve...

Hot Ticket #1 (my mom) and Hot Ticket #2 (my grandfather).

(link best viewed directly from my Tumblr.) sigh Ok, so this...